... now with 57% moar (read: less) content!!!!

Anyway, hi guys and gals... its been a while since a proper journal which included some life stuffs and I'm really out of practice for some serious text walls, so I'll just do what I can.

So yeah, internship time. As some might know, I'm aspiring to become a high school teacher and this semester marks the beginning of my real teaching education. I'm visiting a school, sit in the back of various lessons (preferably my subjects maths and english, btw) and start giving some of my own (with guidance by a teacher) and I already assisted in 7th grad maths.

A delightful job, to say the least. Of course, it's stressful if you got 2 to 3 dozens of children going crazy, but being able to teach them and seeing their expression change when they finally realize the use of this or that formula is seriously worth it. Plus, I believe this is the best position to change the future to something better, if I can educate a new generation... very naive and idealistic, I know, but... AAAHHH LEMME ALONE, I LIKE THAT >:C

Sure, it's a scary job... because of the nature of students (I should know, I was one not too long ago) it's me vs. all of them, but I think I can manage. My physique gives me a little advantage. I'm big enough to make the kids (and teens... I'm gonna teach up to the 12th grade) realize that they can't push me around, but cuddly enough to make them not scared of me 8D

So yeah, that's why I wasn't that active in the past few weeks expect for the occasional comment and scribble. It takes a surprisingly huge amount of preparation to perform a decent class and I'm still trying to get into the rhythm but up til now... I'm pretty positive... and I can't wait to scar generation over generation with my maths classes

... 8 years... dang, time flies, even without fun...

The pile of rubble is gone, but there is still a gaping hole in the middle of New York City... the wound at the heart of the land of the free didn't even slightly became a scar... it didn't heal at all... how comes? Where is the grand monument promised to the survivors and the victim's families? Wasn't there something like a freedom tower planned?

I shouldn't be surprised... but I still am that only after 8 years this solidarity created by the victims of an unrivalled, appalling terrorist act was apparently only a farce... a fragile one to boot. 8 years and still... nothing but delays and political quarrels between incompetent groups... it's sad... so very sad.

But who am I to talk? I'm from Germany after all and how much did 9/11 affect my life? Not. At. All. and as I said last year, I can't properly mourn over something that doesn't affect me. Of course, there are genuine feelings of grief regarding this sad anniversary and there should be. I respect that and will therefore not descend into hypocrisy and mourn myself. As *Agent-Elrond put it quite nicely: I will honor the dead by living. I will honor the bad by doing good. I will honor the past by looking forward.

But it is not the terrorism, or the deaths that make me sad... it's the aftermath. Instead of uniting the people of America, they are more divided than ever... and even after two wars AND causing an economical crisis that still is tearing down the world, they haven't learned anything at all...

To all the people who actually try to be human:
Mourn, if you need to, or do as Rondie and I said above... look forward and live... but make it a day to remember... make it a day worth it....

Happy Towers Day...




[/inane ramblings]

*yawn* I... uh...
wait, WAHT?!

...

when the hell did THAT sneak up on me?!

O_o

uh...

THANKS!!!!

*drops back into sleep*

YES! I'm done with most of my school work and only have to do two term papers over the next month and a half. And... this semester was quite the success. I approve 8D
Anyways, I figured I'd do some hyper tags before heading out to enjoy a little bit of the summer 8D

Ten-ish Things I Wish I Could Say to People:

1. You are my best friend ever since the 10th grade and honestly, you're closer to me than 95% of my family. I appreciate every minute I can spend with you and I hope... no, I know that we will stay this way for the rest of our lives.
2. Seriously, I always thought that I knew you, but now you've proven what a motherfucking asshole you are, but it seems to me that you are too fucking DENSE to realize how much you hurt not only me, but the others as well. You wonder why I want to slap you upside down, although we've been friends for years? I want to slap you upside down, BECAUSE we've been friends. It shows that I still care, but even my patience won't last forever.
3. The short time we had was wrong, yes, but I still keep it as a wonderful memento and if I had the chance, I'd do it again. I guess I still have hots for you. The downside to this all is that I still don't know how to act around you, which is why I've been avoiding you... or talking nonsense... I want to apologize to you, but I'm not sure what for... I guess for everything that happened. I just wish we could go back to how it was before THAT happened.
4. Dude, could you please tone down with the drinking. I know that it's fun to get wasted every once in a while, but DUDE, you're scaring the shit outta me.
5. No, I'm not as strong as I appear to be. I'm unsure of everything, especially of my decisions, I'm scared, especially of the future and I sure as hell don't know shit. Please don't make me carry your weight as well. I can barely take my own.
6. Dang, who would've thought that you'd grow up like that? I still remember how I literally had to pick you up from the gutter and now, despite all the shit life's thrown at you, you're standing straight and tall. Hell, I'm so proud of you.
7. Please learn to let me go. There will be a time where I'll be gone for more than just two days. There will be a time where we won't see each other for months. Please...
8. Thank you... thank you for everything. You've been like a second father AND mother to me and although we've never been THAT close because of the age difference, I still appreciate and love you.
9. We haven't met face to face, but seriously I wish we could. Awesomeness and fun would ensue and craziness be spread all across the lands (actually addressed at several people)
10. You tell me to love THIS family? Brothers who built a 10 foot high wall between each others because of a trifling matter? Sister ready to sue each others' asses off because of a little bit of money? Cheating husbands? Criminal sons? Lazy idiots who only know how to take but not how to give? Well, excuse me if I have a hard time wrapping my mind around the idea that I should love my "family", a bunch of greedy bastards more that my friends who would do anything for me.

Nine things about myself:

1. Yes, I play Magic: The Gathering. No, I'm not a virgin.
2. I'm a total sissy and my pain tolerance is closing to a big, fat zero >>
3. I have a lucky charm based on my zodiac sign. I wouldn't describe myself as superstitious, but I really feel naked and anxious if I don't have it with me.
4. Patience is one of my greatest assets... up til now only two people managed to wear it down to a dangerous level (one just recently)
5. I am scared shitless of spiders. It's ridiculous I know, but I can't help it. :C
6. I juggle and I sing... both not very well, and often at the same time, annoying the shit out of other people XD
7. I like doing a lot of things I have no clue about. (see drawing, sports, music) XD
8. I LOVE the summer. I need me some heat and I need me some sun to function decently.
9. I have no distinct taste in music whatsoever, but that allows me to listen to a huge variety and like it. Sometimes I wish I could waste weeks and months only listening to music.

Eight ways to win my heart:

1. Are these... Magic cards? D:
2. Gaming consoles? O_O
3. ZOMG YAY CHOCOLATE (the darker the better)
4. Girls who play guitar =
5. A good sense of ryhthm and music and being able to dance is a huge plus.
6. Seeking body and skin contact. *purr*
7. A hearty and honest laugh and smile 8D
8. humour and intelligence... cliche-y, but still, nothing is sexier.

Seven things that cross my mind a lot:

1. Sex
2. Boobs
3. Sex
4. Huh, I haven't noticed that combo before. Need to make a deck around it.
5. Of course, globalization might be the reason for many bad things on this planet, but that would simplify the actual problem too much... *insert other political and literature non-sense*
6. I wonder if my friends (RL and online) are doing okay?
7. *whitenoise* (No seriously)
_{8. Sex}

Six things I do before I fall asleep:

1. Check mails and note down a quick to-do-list.
2. Check dA and other communities for some last notes or comments.
3. Set the alarm.
4. Take off my clothes.
5. Listen to my favourite song atm for the last time today
6. Stay awake until 3am because I got caught up chatting with someone >>

Five places I want to visit:

1. Australia (one year to cross the whole continent)
2. TEH US of A (another year just to travel)
3. England
4. Mexico
5. Spain

Four things I'm wearing right now:

1. Boxers
2. ...
3. My watch?
4. .... >.>

Three bands/artists that I listen to often:

1. Newton Faulkner
2. Seeed!
3. Pink (can't help it, I like her :C)

Two things I want to do before I die:

1. Fly (or a temporal equivalent to it)
2. Visit everyone on my watchlist and give him/her a wet willie >8D

One confession:

1. I apparently have NO life.

I tag everyone who, just like me, has too much time at hand XD
(or needs some good excuse for procrastinating.)
I BLAME ^Helewidis >:C
you can of course blame me

... today, my favourite and most trustworthy colleague has left this planet:
My mechanical pencil.
He followed me for over 6 years in his greyish reliableness through every kind of good or bad situation and I know... *sniff* I know he died while doing what he love the most... writing...
and yet... *sniff*
IT'S STILL SO NOT FAIR!!!!! BWAAAAAA!!!
GIVE HIM BACK, GOD, GIVE HIM BACK!!! HE WASN'T SUPPOSED TO GO BEFORE ME!!!!

*cough*

by the way, I finished two essays, did the last homework in stochastics which enables me to attend to the final exam next week and finished reading 3/4 of my reading list for my oral exam in two weeks (check Magaret Edson's play "Wit". It's awesome)
still, I'm far from done and frankly, I think I'm starting to slowly lose my mind...
...
faster than usual...
*eye-twitch*

Oh yeah, EYE-CANCER INTERMISSION [link] [link]

So, don't mind me, kick me if I'm procrastinating too much on this site and keep on moving people 8D

I swear after the next three weeks I'll be going nuts... because I'll have to finish two term paper afterwards :C

WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH, GOD?!
BECUZ UR A JACKASS
Oh yeah, right...

On a completely different and unrelated note:
W00T, new emoticons:





and my new favorite